Sunday, December 13, 2009

Who loves the sun?

Bored today. No money to go anywhere. The beach is closed. I won’t be walking there. The kids don’t want to take a walk. I picked up the bass and nothing. After I sat there with it in my lap for ten minutes I put it away.
Usually when boredom sets in the dark thoughts follow. Not today, I won’t let them. I throw on my headphones and listen to music. I try to think of something to write about, but I’m drawing a blank. Everything I’ve written lately feels forced. I don’t like that. I like it better when it just flows out of my mind.
One more week of work, I have the week of Christmas off. I don’t have a clue about what to do during that time.  My first birthday and Christmas away from home, I will not let it get to me.
I’m actually hungry for the first time in days. I’ve lost 40 pounds since this whole ordeal began. None of my clothes fit me anymore. My pants hang off me. I’m swimming in my shirts and jackets. I look like I’m a little boy wearing his father’s clothes. I ripped the pocket of my favorite coat the other day. I snagged it on the file cabinet. I walked away and it just ripped the pocket off. I’ve had that coat for years. Is that another sign to move on?

3 comments:

Stacy Kay said...

When I'm alone on Christmas I always go to the movies and people watch. It keeps me from being depressed and it makes me feel good to see that there are still nice families in the world.

sloan said...

Maybe during vacation you should try a little retail therapy and get some clothes that fit! (Seriously).

For years and years I always worked on Christmas. It was great. Amusement parks are usually pretty good, not as crowded. The movies are my go to choice.

Better people than me would suggest volunteering at a soup kitchen, church, or shelter.

One day at a time, friend.

Anonymous said...

I hope you decided to go shopping for a new wardrobe